Once My Looks Go, I've Got Nothing

     As a poverty-stricken American, I eat a lot of lunch meat, due to the fact that I cannot subsist on Top Ramen alone (though I have found that using only half the contents of the flavor packet and adding a ton of Sriracha makes it much more palatable). I tend to alternate between turkey, in its various forms, and roast beef. Now, for the purposes of this article, we're setting aside the roast beef for a minute to focus on the poultry. After a quick Arby's plug. You see, I love Arby's roast beef, and as far as I know, they don't even hate homosexuals there! Plus I found this insane Photoshop mash-up of former Arby's mascot Oven Mitt and Mitt Romney, which proves that everything does in fact exist on the internet:      Now then: turkey. My current living quarters is more or less right next to a Safeway, so the majority of my lunch meat consumption has consisted of Safeway-approved brands such as Oscar Mayer, Land-O-Frost and Oscar Mayer. Now, there are varyin

Good afternoon, everyone. Everyone being most likely just me at this point. Anyway, hi. I'm Joey, and what I'm about to do here is introduce what amounts to my third...ugh, I hate this word...blog. Online journal, if you prefer. I know I do. Anyway, as of today I have registered my own name as a domain name, so the dreams of literally dozens, possibly less, have reached their long delayed fulfillment as joeymarsilio.com has officially gone live. And yes, it is every bit as shitty as you might expect. My only web design experience was as a part of a class at UC Santa Cruz taught by a man named Guy Cox (I'm not joking). The website does not exist anymore, unfortunately...if it did, I would have shared it with you in all its hot pink glory. The bottom line is, I don't know HTML from KKK (probably not the best example of an acronym), so whatever I churn out will likely have the visual appeal of a decaying fox corpse. Please bear with me as I figuratively attempt to tel